Happy fuckin' holidays!

This year was the 5th Christmas in a row that I have worked.  I do not mind working on holidays.  It gives people a chance with families to enjoy their time with them.  Granted, this was the first year I have been on my own, i.e. no roommates, so I admit, it actually was a bit depressing.  After work on Dec 24 and 25, I worked out in our work gym again for an hour, simply to waste time so I was not home alone depressed.  I had popcorn and beer for dinner on Christmas eve while watching "Die Hard."  I fell asleep before it was over sometime around 2100h.  Last night, I just had beer for dinner, finished watching "Die Hard" and went to bed at 2045h.  Yup.  I rock at this adulting thing.  I really need to work on the whole grocery shopping thing.  My frige literally has some cheese, pickles, beer and condiments in it.  Great.

I opened some presents from my family both nights.  I love that most of the gifts are for GORUCK events.  I am now totally set on Leukotape, Moleskin, Trail Toes, running socks and merino wool base layers.  Note to self on how to install waist straps using MOLLE system: http://news.goruck.com/gear/attaching-field-pockets-explained/ .  Thanks, Mom!  The base layers totally came in handy this week at work.  Yeesh it is cold out!  It was about 12F when I went in to work this morning.  The past few days we've had hoarfrost and frozen snow fog.  It's pretty awesome looking.  Makes getting up at 0530h for work a little prettier.  'Cause the road conditions are nothing to rave about.


My hamstrings are killing me 

today.  Apparently the lunges I did yesterday were a bit much.  Or maybe it was the 50+min of biking at near level 30 for cardio the day before?  Huh.  At the climbing gym, Alexander showed me pull up form and a system at the gym to try to improve up.  So yesterday, I tried to work on my pull ups.  Fuck.  Trying to keep elbows slightly bent and knees bent under you rather than in front AND not swinging is harder than I thought, haha!  I have a loooooong way to go to improve on that.  I have NEVER been able to do a pull up in my life.  My goal is to be able to do one in 2016.  Fuck yes!  I can do it!

I just found a hella awesome event that I REALLY want to participate in: Rebelle Rally (www.rebellerally.com<http://www.rebellerally.com>).

The website describes it as:

The Rebelle Rally is the first women’s off-road navigation rally raid in the United States.
Blending the love of driving with the ultimate challenge of precise navigation, the Rebelle tests your skills over 7 days of competition. It is not a race for speed, but a unique and demanding event based on the elements of headings, hidden checkpoints, time, and distance using maps, compass, and roadbook.
DISTANCE

Approximately 2,000 kilometers of spectacular desert driving via dirt roads, double tracks, trails, and sand dunes. The course will cross iconic locations and off-road recreational vehicle venues.

VEHICLE CLASSES

» 4×4 – 4-wheel drive vehicles that have a two-speed transfer case (low range)
» Examples – Pickup trucks & SUVs with 4WD including Toyota Tacoma 4×4, Chevy Colorado, Land Rover / Range Rover, etc.
» Crossover – Unibody construction with all-wheel drive (no low range)
» Examples – Subaru Forrester/Outback, Mitsubishi Outlander, Toyota RAV4, etc.

Expedition Portal did a pretty nice article on the event: http://expeditionportal.com/the-rebelle-rally-announces-womens-navigational-event/

Oct 2016 will be their inaugural event.   Downside:  it costs $5,000/person.  Which means each person of a two person team, needs to pay this amount.  Yeeeah, nope.  No way can I afford that.  And the likelihood to find sponsors for $10,000 is pretty extreme.  I wish there were more affordable event options for us poor folk.  *sadface*

I would use my baby, the love of my life, my 2008 Jeep Wrangle Rubicon JK 2-door.  I have a build thread on Jeep Forum: http://www.jeepforum.com/forum/f22/gorillamels-2008-rubi-2448201/

But as I look through it, a lot of my photos and video links no longer work.  Dang you Facebook for changing the settings on photo links.  Argh.  Looks like I will need to upload to photobucket from now on.  Too bad my internet access at home is virtually non-existant.  BAH!

I miss adventuring in my Jeep.  I feel this year I have no done much of it.  Off roading took a back seat to my athletic events in 2015.  I love my GORUCK and other athletic events, they make me happy and the people I have met while doing this events are wonderful.  But I feel that something is missing in me when I do not get out  in nature in the Jeep.  Feeling that spike of adrenaline when I see an obstacle and drive over it.  Reaching the summit of some scenic vista.  Being able to bring a picnic with me to enjoy the scenery.  Yes.  I miss off roading.  I wish the Jeep did not guzzle gas so much.  Otherwise I think I would adventure more.  My goal for 2016 is to find a nice balance of athletic adventuring and Jeep adventuring.  Perhaps combining them more doing things like backpacking/hiking farther afield than the immediate foothills. :-)

My friends up in Robie Creek said I could have his old springs and shocks from his 2008 JKU that he took off for his long arm kit.  That means I can take out my pucks and have real springs with a longer travel range on them.  Yay!  When the weather gets nicer, we can install those and the rest of my OR Fab  rotopax rear bumper that I bought off my friend last year.  I'm pretty stoked for mod day.  Now it needs to get warmer ASAP so we can do it!  I need to get the AEV geometry correction brackets (http://www.aev-conversions.com/shop/jk-geometry-correction-brackets-frt) for the Jeep to help with some wiggle in there.  I installed a new steering stabiliser last week at my friend's place in Robie Creek.  Fuck.  It started snowing, so I spent the night.  Snow did not stop.  I left in the morning to try to beat the downfall.  That was a super pretty drive.  I recorded some of it.  Surprisingly not as slippery as I thought it would be.

Helga!

I love that I have friends that let me "borrow" their dogs so that I can get quality doggy bonding time in.  One friend has a Belgian Malinois that is possibly the most wonderful Mal I have ever met.  My friend lets me take her out hiking.  Such a great dog.  I think she is my four-legged furry soul mate.  I wish I had a lifestyle conducive to owning her and caring for her.  Unfortunately, living on my own with my current work schedule are not fair to owning any living creature for the most part.

This was the up up up part. Graceful Helga.

We climbed to the top of that!

Helga and I went to Celebration Park last week.  We climbed a huge ass butte,  It was hard.  And hella windy out.  My phone was nearly blown out of my hand a few times.  I need to remember to bring a collapsible dog bowl next time.  I had to suck water out of my pack and spit it into my hand for her.  She even scaled a rock wall with me!!!!  Holy fuck!!  I'm thinking of getting her a Ruffwear pack that is made for rock climbing with dogs.  That way she can carry her own gear and water and I can grab and pull her up those rock walls with more ease.  She is also fearless.  Ran and walked along the very edge with a drop of at least 300'+.  I took her off leash since we were the only ones there for miles.  The views were fantastic.  I was so happy out there.  Hiking by ourselves.  Badass dog and I. :-)

Fearless dog & amazing scenery.

Hella windy.  Rock scree everywhere at top.

I went snowshoeing this weekend to get a Christmas tree.  Fuck.  That shit is hard.  We drove past Idaho City, over Mores summit and back down.  All while it is snowing hard.  Highway 21 was down to one lane in places the snow was so high.  And, of course, the asshats with snowmobiles parked at the summit into the road.  Literally, parked in the lane of travel.  WTF.  Driving conditions were already utterly deplorable.  And then to double and triple park people in and park on the highway?  Dumbasses.  I'm sure the plow behind us was equally impressed.  I'm amazed he made it through since the only way to pass by was narrow.  On our way back, we were pleased to see Boise County Sheriff out there and the parking somewhat cleaned up.

Hwy 21...unplowed.

While driving, I really had to go potty.  So we pulled over when we saw a turn out.  The snow was too deep to pull all the way in.  So I ran out.  Snow also too deep for me to go far off the road.  Therefore, I was resigned to poo on the side of the road, in full view of everything.  Great.  I schlepped away from the Burban, patted a spot down and squatted.  The nice thing about deep snow is that when I squatted, it blocked everything, hahaha!  It looked like I was simply sitting in snow.  Except, I then heard a noise.  A scraping noise.  FML.  It was a plow.  Fuck. Fuck fuckery fuck.  Quickly wipe.  Not a quality wipe.  Stand up in full view and pull pants up,  But oh no, not just pants.  We've got base layers that are skin tight.  Oh yeah.  That driver got a full view.  But then again, I'm pasty enough, I may have just blended in with the snow.  I then go away from the road so he can plow by me.  Nope.  This fucker has to stop, put his window down and yell at me...for parking not far enough off the road.  *sigh*  No shit, Sherlock.  Literally.  So I schlep back to the Burban and off we go...me feeling like I really have to clean up that half assed wipe. :-(

Snowshoeing.  Not too hard on a groomed trail that is flat.  Emphasis on flat.  Not so easy going up and down steep hills with 3'+ of snow.  Nope.  Not at all.  Going down, I slid on my ass.  I could not figure out how to get up, so I just slid on my ass for much of the hill.  Going uphill, my foot wouldn't catch and I'd slide forward.  My gloves were soaking wet, so I had to take them off.  Every time I fell, my hands would catch the snow.  They were freezing cold and wet.  I was not making much headway.  My frustration level with my inability to master this seemingly simple task, my fear of being buried in snow and being cold hit maximum.  I cried out of frustration.  I was horribly embarassed.  I DO NOT CRY.  Lies.  I totally do.  But that's for cute and sad youtube videos.  Not for fucking shit up and having a little fit.  Ugh.

Needless to say, we found a tree.  Chopped it down.  I carried it up the hill after I learned how to properly go uphill in snowshoes.  Going down, Alexander carried it.  And took his snowshoes off.  Ha!  The people that broke the trail caught up to my slow side-stepping ass.  They had poles.  Fuck me!  Poles!  Damn, that would have made life so much easier, hahaha!  Nice people.  And apparently smarter than me.  Meh.  But at least we have a Christmas tree now!  And one that we worked hella hard for.  It is now proudly displayed with while lights and cat toys decorating it.  Keeping it classy.  I like it and that's what counts. :-)

My friends tell me that the title of this blog is no longer accurate and that I should modify it.  I admit there is truth to this.

I also must admit, dating is almost like being in high school all over again.  Or maybe the first day of college.  I have no idea what the hell I am doing.  I figure at this point in my life, I should know this shit, right?  Nope.  No effing clue what the rules are.  If there are any rules and if/when I am breaking or following them.  Shit.  I guess at least it feels natural and I really try not to stress about it much.  Going with the flow seems to be the best course of action.  Random collection of thoughts that run through my head:

• Am I texting too often?
• Am I over communicating?
• Am I over analysing this?
• Does he really like me?
• Why does he like me?
• Does he like me as much as I like him?
• Will these feelings of happiness last?
• What is the next step/move?
• Are we moving too fast?  Too slow?
• Is he tired of me being around, yet?
• What does that facial expression mean?
• Is he disappointed I cannot cook worth a crap?
• Are my interests too daunting?
• Am I talking too much?  Too little?
• Do I hog all the covers?
• How do we make time for each other in between our work schedules?
• Am I too demanding for activities?

I was thinking about this the other day, the last time I truly dated someone was four years ago.  Holy shit.  Four years!  But you know what?  Fuck it.  This is great.  I am having a wonderfully lovely awesome time.  Go with the flow.  Calm the fuck down.  You can do it!

Humbuggery and Happiness

Tis the season for holiday cheer and delight. I honestly am not a fan of such things as they do not apply much to me. I prefer not to do gift exchanges in celebration of Christmas. Primarily since I would rather craft my gift for the recipient. I feel those are more meaningful.  My blood family members live thousands of miles away, so I have no cause to celebrate the holidays.  If I am honest with myself, spending time, including holidays would be more meaningful to me if spent with Friends at this point in my life.  I have worked the past four years of Christmases. This will be my fifth. And I am perfectly fine with that. I'd rather work and give the opportunity for my coworkers with families to spend that time with them.

I had a family member come visit me. It was a less than pleasant trip. I love my family greatly, but it honed in to me how very different I am from my family members. I guess you could call me the black sheep of the family. And I am totally fine with that. I am happy with my life. Where I have gone. What I have accomplished. Where I am going. How I am. There is always room for change and/or improvement. But overall, I am living the life I know and am happy with. Albeit, I wish there was more money for adventuring *cough Mongol Rally and Camel Trophying* and to help ease the stress of paying off debt. But that is life. And I must carry on.

I am both happy and disappointed at the lack of snow here. Just rain. And mild temps. Like 40s and 50s temps. Although I cannot complain too much. I spend less on propane and am less cold in my lovely trailer home...which now has skirting and has been Refletixed the shit out of. Wrapping my hoses with heat tape and doing winter prep when you are always gone was no easy task. I'd come home from work and do it in the cold dark. Crawling under the trailer and having no idea if I was doing it right. Apparently I did well so far.

 

So. I, Hannibal, have met Alexander. For those of you not familiar with those names, go research them. Granted, everyone mentioned on here has pseudonyms. With that being said, we know Hannibal and Alexander never met in real life. For the sake of being creative and attempting to maintain the same theme, Alexander (and his beloved Bucaphalus), exist alongside me, Hannibal...in modern times. :-)

 

Now, let's put things in perspective. Two people. Meet. Go on adventures. Happy. Let us hope the campaign of Happiness and Adventure continues.

Hey guys, got any Reese's?

Per multiple requests from friends after reading my last entry, I realised I had not done a summary of my Halloween GORUCK event.  My error.  Therefore, this must be immediately rectified!

Halloween.  Most adults take advantage of this holiday to act silly.  Drink.  Be merry.  All while wearing some form of a costume...however scantily clad or fully covered they may be.  I have done this for years.  Attend parties or go out on the town (usually in my full body dinosaur costume, which my mom made for me when I was 22yrs old.  Yep.  My mommy rocks).  Not this year.  2015 would be different.  I attended my costumed party the week before.  Now this time, I get to wear my costume and lug around heavy shit and be a billy badass with fellow sadistic people in the cold wet Seattle weather.

I went to Seattle with a fellow RWB/GORUCK friend.  We arrived ~0400h.  Driving through Snoqualmie pass sucks donkey dick.  And that's not a good thing.  Hydroplaning and driving through flooded interstate in a small economy-sized Mazda is not something I would ever put on the "fun" list.  Fuck that shit.  Effing sucked hard.  My friend and I decided to do the GORUCK Light on Halloween with a fellow GORUCKer that lives in the Seattle area.  I was dressed as Rainbow Dash.  Friend was dressed as a cabana girl.  Seattle friend wore a giant Franzia box with a pink wig and ranger panties underneath.  Brave man indeed.  For the sake of this story, we will call him "Budders".

Our event started.  Everyone was in costume.  It was great.  There was a OCR Spartan, a father/son zombie team, Luke Skywalker, Lara Croft, a prisoner, a hula girl, Caitlin Jenner, Batman, Superman, a transformer, etc.  At least everyone came in costume.  The Welcome party was interesting since, well, I had a tail.  And trying to crabwalk with a tail is no easy task.  Watching Budders do the crab walk with one hand in the air opening and closing certainly made it more amusing.  As the event went on, our friend Budders proceeded to drink more and more.  I was quite impressed with his ability to pee and walk at the same time.  Although there were a few close calls with him peeing on people's shoes.  I advised him to improve his aim.

We carried pumpkins through UW campus, where people were tailgating for the day's game.  I got to explain GORUCK to a UW police officer as he watched us bunny hop up a fuck ton of stairs.  I got to carry a shovel for much of the event.  I was elected TL (Team Leader) for about 3/4 of the event.  I felt terrible that I did not get to carry the really heavy shit.  Instead, I delegated to people when to switch and take rests and where to go.  Budders found a few college students to chat up.  He had one of them take his place to carry the log.  He then decided that the thing he wanted most in the world were peanut butter cups.  He asked everyone.  And I mean EVERYONE if they had Reese's available.

We did a pumpkin carving contest.  Luckily my group had Luke Skywalker.  Unfortunately, we had the pumpkin that had be dropped and thus was partially smashed and a huge gash through it.  We made use of this by making it appear to eat Yoda.  We won!  Wooooo!  In the end, we all finished together.  And there was a nice bonfire at the end waiting for us.  I had a great time.  Shit man, Lights are great.  We managed to do it in 7h and went 11-14mi.  I was pretty pleased with us.  Budders was beyond drunk, but he didn't pee directly on anyone, so I'd say it was a win.  Someone get that man a Reese's!!!

And now, back to regular life.  My life.  Right now.  This moment.  Effing rocks.  I am happy.  Life is going well.  It has been hard to not be allowed to ruck.  My ankle/foot is feeling much better, so I think that I shall give it a go this week to try weights in my ruck.  Granted for the past 2 weeks I have gone on hikes with a backpack.  Just not my 20lb plate.  I do not consider the hikes cheating per se...

Now that I spend time with people, I realise that my lifestyle is, well, active.  I am rarely at home.  Like ever.  I use my abode as a place to sleep and that is about it.  Which I am perfectly fine with.  Life is too short to be at home doing jack shit on a regular basis.  I want to go out.  Have fun.  See the world.  Play in nature.  Socialise with people I like.  Even better if I can combine all those things together as one.  I have also come to realise, after this past weekend, that my friends are my family.  I have always known this, but it was recently honed in to me.  When I call my friend in tears for some unfortunate event in the evening and that friend drops everything, replans their evening, stops at the grocery store, makes me food, buys me a coloring book, writes me a check to help me get by when I know they are barely scraping by, too, and lets me sleep over, I know I have a friend for life.  I know I can ask almost any of my close friends and they would all do the same.  I love my friends.  They help make my life a happier place.  They are there for me.  They are my family.  Now this is not to say that my blood relatives mean any less to me.  But they are 1000s of miles away.  I see and interact with them rarely.  I love them.  From afar.

My collective of close friends mean the world to me.  When I ask the adventure ones to do some crazy outdoor adventure, I can count on at least one to agree to come with me.  When I need help shopping for bras that make my boobs look good, I can count on one to help me be and look girly.  When I do some monumental blonde fuck up, we can laugh together and pick up the pieces giggling...and probably drinking wine.  When I break my Jeep or need mechanical help, they show me how to do it and let me use their tools, shop and time.

Example: I got a text from Cabana girl friend telling me there is a woman out there, Erin Spineto (http://erinspineto.blogspot.com/), that is a type 1 diabetic (T1D) who does adventurous active things.  And that I should look into her website.  Hells yes!  Someone I can try to connect with and achieve me goal of starting a support group in my local area for T1D athletes.  :-)  I even connected with a T1D that has done a GORUCK Heavy and is training for a HCL (Heavy-Challenge-Light).  Fuck.  Man.  So far, I'm just trying to survive the training for a Heavy.  This ankle injury has me worried I may not be able to finish a Heavy.  So very worried. :-(

In other news, I got rock climbing shoes (http://www.fiveten.com/us/climbing/moccasym-red), a harness (Black Diamond Primrose: http://blackdiamondequipment.com/en/climbing-harnesses/primrose-harness-BD651069SMOKSM_1.html) and now a chalk bag/ball.  Yes!  I have watched some vidoes of people like Tommy Caldwell (http://www.patagonia.com/us/ambassadors/rock-climbing/tommy-caldwell/71506) who are world renown for their climbing skills.  Whoa.  My forearms hella hurt from last night's climbing jaunt at the gym.  I did not make it to the top.  But I made it higher on 5.7s and 5.8s that have stumped me before.  I take far too long to make a decision and then I psyche myself out when I'm there.  Most of my challenges with climbing stem from my mental blocks I create and my fear of....the unknown?  Heights?  Falling?  Meh.  Something.  I now try to climb higher and longer and push past my fears.  But it takes work.  I know there are times it frustrates my climbing partner.  But he does a good job hiding it and cheering me on.

I finally succession climbed last week!  Made it to the top of a route that I'd been trying for weeks to conquer.  After I made it to the top and back down, my partner said I should do it again.  So I did!  Fuck yes!  It was only a 5.6.  But still.  Progress!!!
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Nov summary

I know it has been a long time.  The past 2 months have been very busy for me.

Halloween weekend was spent in Seattle doing a GORUCK Light event.
The next weekend I had a Highland Games competition in Huntington, OR.

 

 

 

The next weekend, Veteran's Day weekend, was spent in Seattle doing a GORUCK Challenge.  Holy hell.  That was by far the hardest physical event I have ever participated in.  First, it was raining hard all day.  Heavy.  It was cold and windy, too.  Event started at 2000h.  Lots of PT, going up and down a hill.  I did crappy.  I was disappointed in my performance during the Welcome Party.  We ran.  I really wanted to vomit.  A lot.  But it stayed in.  We did the tunnel of love.  It took so dang long.  It was so hard.  I basically pulled myself forward with my arms, dragging my body.  We got soaked.  Everything was wet.  Then we started our march...21 of us.  We had the following coupons: 2 5-gal water containers full of water, sandbag full of kettle bells, the Veteran's ruck (weighing in ~60lbs), sandbag full of everyone's food (aside from mine and another fellow T1D), team weight: 25lbs of chains, 50lb weighted vest, a giant Pelican case full of misc weights that took 2-3 people to carry and the log from hell.  It took at least 7 people to carry it at any given time.  We also had the American flag and the GORUCK flag.  So, that meant that at any given time, no one was without additional weights.  It was so hard.  That log was so heavy.  Halfway through the night 4 people quit.  We were down to 17. We were so wet and cold that we penguin huddled for warmth.  Luckily, cadres did not make us carry the log after that.

It was a great group of people.  Three women, including myself remained.  Both of the were short, so they were not as useful on the log.  That also meant that I was on the log quite a bit.  At one point, after daylight, my foot slipped off the side of the pavement and landed on the ground.  Unfortunately, the ground was wet and I slid.  I fell.  One of my teammates had lightning speed and caught my coupon before it hit the ground.  Thank God!  It hurt.  I skinned my knee.  Everything was sore and hurting by that time.  But we did it.  We made it to the starting point.  We went into the Sound.  Did flutter kicks.  Water did not feel cold, we were already so wet and cold, it made no difference.

 

One thing I learned, do not eat greasy hamburgers the day of the event.  Let me tell you, trying to do that event while your insides are deciding they are not happy is not pleasant.  At one point, I was farting and suddenly realised that that next push would not be a fart.  And oh man, it really pushed and wanted to come out.  Shit.  Literally.  So, while physically exerting myself, I had to keep my innards squeezed tight.  I became listless.  I did not interact with people as much.  I was so uncomfortable.  I was afraid I'd poo myself.  This went on for at least an hour.  Since in GORUCK events, you cannot just stop and go potty.  You have to hold it until the cadre gives you a break.  We were on our way to Gasworks park.  I knew where that was.  The closer we got, the more it was harder to hold in.  When we made it to the park, one of my teammates dropped his weight.  This meant PT.  Shit.  Fuck.  Shit.  Fuck.  I took my glove off.  I was anticipating shitting myself and needing to scoop the poop out.  We did push ups.  My arms were so tired, I literally bent my elbows a wee bit or stuck my bum in the air and drooped down.  Then we did flutter kicks.  Yep.  It's coming.  I'm gonna poop.  I did not flutter much.  I bent my knees and held them there.  I squeezed as much as I could.  I wanted to cry, I was so uncomfortable.  Then that was it.  Done with PT.  I grabbed the nearest female.  Dragged her to a tree, dropped trou and shit myself crazy.  It was not satisfying.  I had to make sure I got it all out since I did not know when the next potty break would be.  I held on to that tree and groaned.  It was a vocal poo.  But I got it all out.  I wiped my ass with wet leaves.  I did not care.  I got it out and didnt shit myself.  Mission accomplished.  Whew.

 

 

At the end there were donuts and coffee and a fire.  I was so thankful.  I was so tired.  Sore.  Wet.  Cold.  I just wanted to cuddle someone for warmth.  I slept the rest of the day at a friend's house.  I am thankful for my GORUCK community.  So very thankful.  We form such great bonds, working together as a team.  If one of them needed something, I would love to be there to help them with it.

The weekend after that, I did a half marathon ruck.  I signed up for the Struttin for Stuffin half marathon at the last minute.  I needed to get my 12mi ruck in 3h30m or less per the Pathfinder Training that I am doing.  My friend decided to do it with me.  I love my rucking friends.  They're great.  I got 12mi done in 3h!!! Fuck yes!  Three hours!  My left ankle/foot hurt so much throughout the whole thing.  I actually thought this task was harder than most rucks I do.  I did not permit myself to stop.  Not even once.  I had to get that time hack done and I was not sure of my time for much of it until I realised my GPS on my phone stopped tracking.  Luckily I had my watch on me.  Ugh, hurt so much.  I ended up doing the whole 13.1mi in 3h30m.  That last 1.1mi was a rest mile after the hardship I endured before that.

Unfortunately, that event also obliterated my ankle.  Per doctor's instructions, no rucking for 2 weeks.  No high impact activities (no rucking, running, hiking, jumping, etc.).  And I must get new shoes.  Well.  I got 2 pairs of shoes, one on order.  Scott Kinabalu, they have drain ports built in (https://www.scott-sports.com/us/en/video/running/new-kinabalu-supertrac-shoe/)! ; And Saloman SpeedCross Pro (http://www.salomon.com/us/product/speedcross-pro.html), holy tread Batman!  It was interesting going into the shoe stores telling them the list of things I want/need on a shoe: water ports or at least good water drainage, ankle support, light weight, grip/tread that curls up on to the toe, rugged tread for wet trails, able to PT comfortably and good cush.

Oct Summary

Long time no see.

Much has happened.  Nothing truly epic.  Just stuff.  I have gotten into rock climbing.  I find it hellaciously fun in so many ways.  I have a group of friends that I go to a local climbing gym with and we encourage each other to keep trying.  I have much to learn.  I have not yet made it to the top, but I am getting closer each time.  A mental barrier hits me at some point.  My hands get more sweaty and my arms start to give out.  I need to learn to use my legs so much more rather than rely on my upper body for all the power and strength.  My climbing friends are quite inspirational for me to try harder.  I am glad for their patience.  Yesterday I wore my Rainbow Dash costume while climbing, in celebration of Halloween.  It was fun.  The headband of ears got annoying as sweat was making things slippery.

This past weekend I kayak camped with a friend and his friends.  We did Silver Creek out of Picabo, ID.  Very slow water.  Easy.  Scenic.  Shit ton of fish on the first day’s journey.  Looks to be fairly oligotrophic creek, full of aquatic vegetation.  Fun to watch the fish swim from one plant channel to another.  The water was crystal clear.  Breath-takingly so.  On the second day, we kayaked further.  Putting in at our camp spot.  My friend and I took Sun Valley to Stanley to Lowman to Banks home.  Beautiful drive.  I am glad for the friends that I have.

I started training with the Spearhead Pathfinder program to help me get ready for my GORUCK Heavy that I hope to do in May.  Training started on Oct 1.  There are various “challenges” we have to complete during the 12-week program.  We also have to ruck at least 75mi, be a team “leader” for some WODs (workout of the day), ruck so many miles before/after a workout, etc.  I am thoroughly enjoying my training.  It is kicking my ass royally.  My shoulders and neck are always tired.  I carry my ruck with my 20lb plate almost everywhere I go.  I even wore it during the Mountain Home Highland Games that I competed in.  So many people wanted to know what I was doing.  So I got a chance to explain GORUCK to them.

I took 3^rd overall of 7 in my women’s novice group.  I even scored 1^st in the light weight for distance toss and tied for 1^st on the cabre toss.  I need to start making my own implements, or at least finding some stones I can practice on to get better.  I enjoy training and competing in the games.

So far, 2015 has been such a wonderful year for myself.  I have grown so much more as a person and gotten to know myself so much more in the past 10months than I have almost any others before that.  I am finally comfortable with who I am as a person.  I look in the mirror at the gym while working out and am proud of the reflection looking back at me.  I have worked very hard on my health, improving my strength and taking time for me, to do and pursue the things that I enjoy.  I think living on my own has helped with this.  I set my own schedule.  I do my own thing.  Sometimes I wish I had a permanent dwelling to live in.  Especially now that the weather has been cooling off.  Ick.  I’m always a little chilled now.  But for now, I am holding off on much winterization since I am moving to a different spot in the park next week.  I saw a used 27’ gooseneck that has the polar package for sale locally.  I got so excited to see it.  But the owner wanted to give me much less than what I thought mine was worth to trade it as a down payment.  Sad.  So my summer 21’ trailer will have to do.  I hope this winter is not too cold.  I encountered a problem that the water pressure going in the trailer was too great.  It started to fill up my fresh water tank.  So now I have a hose attached to a pressure valve to let the water drip out.  I will have to figure out a different solution since overnight freezes are occurring.  *sigh*  I probably have to buy a new valve part or something.  Suck.

I have a GORUCK Light event on Halloween in Seattle this weekend.  I admit I am not overly excited for it simply because I am stressing a bit about my move and trying to find someone with the proper hookups to help me move my trailer and thus all my other accoutrements with it.  I want to do more overnight kayaking/camping trips before the snow prevents it.  I am glad to have friends willing to be as crazy as I am for our outdoor adventures.  Much thanks to you, Friends.  I do not think I tell you often enough how much I appreciate your existence and the time we spend together.

I have also come to realise that in order to achieve a certain level of happiness, it helps to have another human to bond to intimately.  I have not done that for years.  And I miss it terribly.  I do not let it get me down.  And I do not deviate from my criteria for a life partner.  But I have found an online community full of people similar to myself and it is so refreshing to see that people just like me all over the U.S. are having the same problems.  It is a relief to know that I am not alone in that aspect.  It is the little things, like a touch.  Not just a hug from a friend or when hands or limbs accidentally brush against one another.  I mean a touch from someone that has meaning.  The touch has meaning.  I also have not had that for years.  So much to the point that I shy away from human touch in general, whether from friends or not.  It at times, makes we hyper vigilant and anticipatory.  So when I find someone I am comfortable with, it is a relief to just touch.  Simple touch.  A lean in.  A hand hold.  It amazes me how much happier and fulfilling those little things can make a person feel.  Someday I may find the person who makes me feel that way regularly.  Someday.  Until then, at least I love myself. 

Spot on article about being an "Alpha Female".

Seattle & Winter Living Prep

Seattle!



This past weekend a friend and I drove over to Seattle to go visit another friend.  I met both through my participation in GORUCK events.  I truly do enjoy the company of the people I have met through those events and through Team RWB.  I spend much of my social time with them.  They assisted me after my surgery by swapping vehicles with me, letting me stay with them, bringing me food, etc.  I cannot pass over my other non-rucking friends who helped just as much.  I am thankful for the friends I have made during my time living here.  To be honest, they are the reason I have stayed here for as long as I have.  My friends are my family.  I have no permanent home or blood family here.  I could just as easily pick up and move somewhere else.  Which, believe me when I say, I have been very much tempted to do so at times.



I sometimes get quite down about my lack of dating or finding someone to possibly have a relationship with.  I know that I am a fantastic person that has a fuck ton to offer.  And after learning the hard way, I have established standards and I will not deviate from them.  I noticed once I put that in place, I have not truly dated ever since.  Yes, there are a few one or two dates here and there, but overall, I feel no connection to those people.  I want to feel inspired by the person.  I want to look forward to seeing them.  I want to be mentally and physically challenged by them.  I want someone who has goals in life and is striving to achieve them.  And very importantly to me, they must be employed or at least have a legal source of income so that I am not the breadwinner.  Believe me, I’ve been the breadwinner.  And it is bullshit.  I want someone who trusts me and I trust them.  Someone who wants to go on adventures, plans them and executes those plans.  Someone who does not need me to function, yet chooses to be with me because it makes them happy to do so.  How hard is it to find someone like this?  Apparently very hard.  Especially the no criminal history and intelligent open-minded part.  I have frequently found myself missing living in Washington, DC simply for the better pool of dating applicants.  Pathetic.



Summer is in the last throes before fall totally takes over.  This means I need to start preparing the trailer for winter.  Ugh.  So much work to do.  I need to build skirting around the bottom and under the gooseneck.  I plan to put foam insulation around the inside of the skirting, if I can find enough cheap stuff.  I found some at a secondhand building store.  But I need much more.  I need to buy the wood for the skirting, too.  And then figure out how to build it.  I may call upon my friends to help with this task.



I need to get large diameter PVC piping to thread my septic hose through.  I need to get a 5-gallon bucket to put over my water spigot and insulate the inside of it.  I need more PVC piping for my water hose, which will be wrapped in heat tape.  I need to insulate all my windows and door.  I found some websites with great ideas.  It looks like using Reflectix padding in the windows and then sealing the windows with the winter plastic.  I need to also use padding/Reflectix in my closets and cupboards to have insulate in there and help prevent moisture build up.  I need to get a dehumidifier and little box heater.  Ugh.  I am seeing dollar signs adding up with all these tasks.



My trailer needs a good washing, but I do not have a pressure washer or extended brush to reach all around the top areas.  The area under my trailers always seems to be damp.  I need to get under there and thoroughly look around for any leaks.  I need to also get up on the roof to see what needs to be done up there for winter.  I know I should cover the skylight over the shower to help insulate it.  I also need to make curtains for all the windows and one over the door.  I need to add Reflectix between the screen door and main door.  I will admit, I feel utterly overwhelmed by all this.  Sometimes it is easier to stick my head in the sand and pretend life is not so complicated at times….that is, until winter hits and I am not ready.  Fuck.



Back to Seattle.  I did not finish that story.  My friend and I met some GORUCK peeps out there.  Helped out.  We’ll have to send out a thank you note to them for how badass we all are, hahaha!  Saturday we all went to Edmunds and sat at the beach hanging out watching the ferries come and go.  I could not get over how green and lush it is there.  I truly loved and miss it.  Idaho is high desert.  We do not have green like that.  We only get it for a short time in spring before the brown hues take over.  Do not get me wrong, Idaho is breath-takingly beautiful in its topography, but I truly pine for lush green forests and oceans/waterways.



This weekend is GORUCK’s 5th anniversary.  They have a 50% sale going on now.  So of course, I signed up for a Challenge-Light in Bend, OR in April 2016.  I am debating whether I want to do the MLK Challenge-Light in January 2016 in Washington, DC.  I have the credits from the Halloween C-L that I had to cancel on.  And since I have been pining for DC so much lately, I figure I may just bite the bullet and pay for the $350 airfare to go.  Maybe?  Yea? Neigh?

9/11: Never Forget

Where were you on 11 September 2001?

 

Me?  I was in the library of my high school awaiting the start of school.  There was a TV on a stand in the corner tuned to the news of the event.  Someone in the library told me that a plane ran into a building in New York City.  We both scoffed.  Really?  Who runs a plane into a building?  We were thinking small, single prop type plane that ran off course.  Then we watched the news.  We saw a second (very large) plane hit the second WTC tower.  We were not scoffing any more.  We watched in fascinated horror.

The first tower fell while I was in homeroom.  The second tower fell when I was in AP Physics.  We stared in muted silence.  We discussed the physics involved in bringing a building of that size to rubble.  It was to vast to comprehend.  Everyone was wondering if anyone we knew had family affected by the event.  The FAA grounded all flights in the U.S.  The death toll kept rising.  We heard of a third plane hitting the Pentagon causing a gaping hole.  We were afraid the White House was next and what or who was doing this coordinated attack on our soil?  There were reports of a fourth plane that had crashed in a field in PA.  Dumbstruck is the best description of the day. 

Many businesses closed in my hometown.  I remember calling the photographer that did my senior portraits to see if they were open so I could pick them up.  In the ensuing weeks, I felt a swell of pride to be an American.  How dare terrorists attack us and kill so many innocent people.  I also felt a wave of guilt as I admitted to myself that I was impressed by the attacks themselves.  They were very well coordinated.  They caused a massive amount of devastation.  I was angry that we let it happen.  Granted, our way of life as Americans changed that day.  And it has ever since.

My family flew into Reagan Airport less than a month after the attacks to look at graduate schools for my sister.  I recall when we were 30min from DC, we were not allowed to leave our seats and we had 2 fighter plane escorts to the airport.  Yes.  Life has changed as we know it.

On this fourteenth anniversary of the attacks, I find myself more emotional when looking at the photos and videos of the event.  Back when I was a senior in high school when the event happened, I did not have the life experience I do now, I did not know anyone directly affected.  Now I have met people affected, people who lost loved ones.  We have been engaged in war ever since where thousands of soldiers and contractors have lost their lives.  We live in a different world now.  And when I watch those videos, I cry.  When I see those photos, my chest tightens.

I feel it is a dishonor to those that died for me to pass on looking at the photos and watching the videos on this day.  I do not wish to see them.  But thousands died.  The least I could do is look and remember and honor.  The most heart and gut-wrenching part is seeing people jump from the towers.  People who saw no other option that to plummet to their death at the foot of the WTC towers.  Hearing their bodies hit while the firefighters, paramedics and police flock on scene.  I will never forget that.  Never.  Ever.

So.  Let us never forget.  I copied and pasted info/facts from a CNN article released today:

Facts:19 men hijacked four fuel-loaded U.S. commercial airlines bound for west coast destinations. This terrorist attack on the United States was orchestrated by al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden. A total of 2,977 people were killed in New York City, Washington, DC, and outside of Shanksville, Pennsylvania, in the worst terrorist attack in U.S. history.

The Victims:
At the World Trade Center site in Lower Manhattan, 2,753 people were killed when hijacked American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175 were intentionally crashed in the north and south towers.

Of those who perished during the initial attacks and the subsequent collapses of the towers, 343 were New York City firefighters, another 23 were New York City police officers and 37 others were officers at the Port Authority.

The victims ranged in age from two to 85 years. Approximately 75-80 percent of the victims were men.

At the Pentagon in Washington, 184 people were killed when hijacked American Airlines Flight 77 crashed into the building.

Near Shanksville, Pennsylvania, 40 passengers and crew members aboard United Airlines Flight 93 died when the plane crashed into a field. It is believed that the hijackers crashed the plane in that location, rather than their unknown target, after the passengers and crew attempted to retake control of the flight deck.

As of September 2015, 1,640 of 2,753 WTC victims' remains have been positively identified.

Timeline:
September 11, 2001
- 8:46am ET - American Airlines Flight 11 (traveling from Boston to Los Angeles) strikes the north tower of the World Trade Center in New York City.
- 9:03am ET - United Airlines Flight 175 (traveling from Boston to Los Angeles) strikes the south tower of the World Trade Center in New York City.
- 9:37am ET - American Airlines Flight 77 (traveling from Dulles, Virginia to Los Angeles) strikes the Pentagon Building in Washington.
- 9:59am ET - South tower of WTC collapses in approximately 10 seconds.
- 10:03am ET - United Airlines Flight 93 (traveling from Newark, New Jersey to San Francisco) crashes in a field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania.
- 10:28am ET - North tower of WTC collapses. The time between the first attack and the collapse of both World Trade Center towers is 102 minutes.

 

 

I read some stories on Facebook today.  I wanted to share some of them on here.

 

From: The New York City Firefighter Brotherhood Foundation Facebook page:

"9/11/2001. FDNY Ladder 118 crosses the Brooklyn Bridge into lower Manhattan. This picture captures the last alarm all 6 of the members riding on that rig would ...ever respond to. The men from Ladder 118 responded into the chaos and emerged at the doomed Marriott World Trade Center hotel. Survivors remembered seeing men with the number 118 on their helmets running up the stairs to help the panicked guests. They were never seen alive again.
When the 110-story towers collapsed, the hotel was pulverized. More than 900 guests and scores of Marriott employees escaped. Many were likely aided by the men of Ladder 118.Their rig, a mangled wreck of steel and glass, was recovered within days of the attack. Two months later, firefighters digging in the mountain of rubble spotted tools emblazoned with the Ladder 118 logo.
Some of the men from Ladder 118 were found within a few feet of each other, and the survivors in the firehouse were grateful that the men spent their final moments together. Three of them — Agnello, Vega and Cherry — are together still, buried in adjacent plots in Brooklyn's Green-Wood Cemetery. Their simple yet elegant headstones sit on quiet, grassy slope, shaded by a canopy of oak trees. Every year, the families and firefighters make a sacred pilgrimage to their graves, as well as to those of their other fallen brothers elsewhere in the region.
"They were found side by side, and they should stay side by side," said VinnieCarla Agnello. Her two sons were 3 and 1 at the time"

 

 

Here is an interesting link that has people from different countries explaining how they experienced 9/11.  Granted, most people were children when the event happened, but it still shows how for at least one day, humanity banded together.

 

 

Today, the site of World Trade Center Towers 1 and 2 has a memorial and museum.  Last year, One World Trade Center had its grand opening on 09/11/14.

This week marks the 16th birthday of the last surviving search and rescue dog that assisted at Ground Zero in NYC after the attacks.  Her name is Bretagne.  Here is a post and video on Barkpost in which she is brought back to NYC to have the best birthday of her life and to give thanks and honor for the services she provided during the 9/11 aftermath.

 

 

 

 Tonight some of my Team RWB friends went to the Boise Fallen Firefighter and 9/11 Memorial after dark and lit some candles in remembrance for the event and those that lost their lives.